Every one that wants to live a Godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted
I remember a time 30 years ago when I would not speak of anything that someone thought was important in fear of someone recognizing I was not. I had committed so many sins and was full of guilt and shame never thinking anyone would ever love me, much less I thought I was someone God would ever die for. I thought for many years I only got the love I deserved because of all the sins I committed. An abusive marriage where I got talked down to and made fun of while I was beaten down physically and mentally. I always wanted to please everyone but never being able to because I thought I had messed up too many times. I thought I was receiving the love I deserved because of what I had done and because who I thought I was.
Then one glorious day God sent someone to me that told me about His love and all his gifts. She told me how I could find Him and receive all of His gifts by having faith in Him our Savior. She said then It would be the beginning of knowing my true self He had created before I was born. His gift of grace had a huge effect on me when He forgave every sin I had committed. I told Him I was His and my life was His ,to use any way He chose. I told my Father all about my sins and what I had done and ask for His love and forgiveness I knew I did not possess. He washed me with His fountain of love that washed over me and brought me to my knees, it was so powerful, with many hours of weeping. I still weep over the power His love He gives me, and I will continue to everyday into eternity. I began receiving a new mind that desired new and amazing things, I myself would have never desired. I began craving His interest in people and letting everyone know about His never-ending love that goes way beyond ourselves in our own understanding. I began to tell people to call on Him and He would tell you things you did not know about yourself and others. When I started telling people He started giving more of everything I could have ever dreamed of, with a new life and a new,Spirit to complete my body. People in my life began changing and He kept,bringing new people every day. I did not have to seek these people they came,and He changed their life, and they and I are still changing! He gave me the,ability to write about me and these people and how He changed all of us along,with our relationships and circumstances in or lives! He has given me five books to write and I will complete them because He has given me the people and His message through them! He still is giving me people to confirm His power and love in them and I have faith in Him He will always guide people to me so they too can know about His unending love so we can share His love together learning from one another!
Some people, not many, started telling me how to talk and when to talk and how to worship this amazing God I had come to personally know with His wisdom and His knowledge He had given me. They started saying things about me that was not true, telling me I was false because I thought I wasbetter than everyone else. I never said anything but how much He loved all of us. He gave me a ministry and people started disliking me more, I never talk about what I do, where I go and the miracles I see because people may think tohighly of me. It is not about me, it is about God and what He has done through me, and He wants to be able to work out His love through everyone! I was excited to go to church! I had been many times in my life but His love had not guided me to go before. By the love He was giving me I was compelled to worship, I could not wait to worship with people that loves Him as I do. He made me feel important and worthy because He was giving me Himself, and I knew I was still not worthy but He was. I was being lifted up above the world and all it had to offer, by the love and forgiveness I received. He was making me His daughter to be used by Him. I was and am each day redeemed. He had given me confidence to speak about Him. He and His love for all of us is all I really get excited talking about, because that is all He truly gets excited about,because without His love we cannot love others the right way. I thought I would never be a person that could talk about someone as important as Him my Savior.I thought He would never talk to me and teach me His ways, because of the person I thought I was. He delivered me from evil and saved me by His grace andI will always remain in Him and His word because of the love I received fromthe cross! A love that was so powerful changed me from not looking or talkingto anyone to looking, loving and talking to everyone about our God and SaviorJesus Christ.
Now I am being told to be quiet. They are telling me to letsomeone that is more important than you talk, and don't worship the way you do,it is distracting me. I wrote a heart led story about this and the people that love Him as I do responded, not knowing I was going to get any response, butGod did. I want so much for everyone to know His love that cares for us so muchthat we do not have to want for anything. I thought there had become a change in people's heart, enough change where we all could worship and talk together lifting each other up way beyond our own imaginations, where the impossible becomes possible! To my shock and amazement I was advised last week from thePastor of my church, a church that is supposed to be led by Christ through theHoly Spirit, it would be best for me not to worship at this church any more due to the persecutions I have endured. You see I was confused when I began to get persecuted by people who loved God has much as I did, so I talked to my Pastor thinking He would reassure me about God’s love and through me others will see His love and it would change their hearts. I had talked to my Pastor about all the persecution I was enduring for no reason and hoping He would give me some guidance, he supported the ones that persecuted me because they were the leaders of the church. I was someone that did not matter, unimportant, an ordinary everyday person who has Faith in God knowing He is everything He says He is. I had only been going to that church for over two years and gave myself to everyone with great joy, but not everyone received what I was giving and not everyone gave their selves to me. I was not rich and giving money to the church, I was helping people and giving to the needy out of my husband’s pocket and through donations from others that gave to the ministry God gave me, not giving to the church organization. I kept everything to myself about the ministry God was giving me and how He was changing people’s lives through me. I was giving to the ministry God gave me. My husband and I was blessed with more money through His job then we had ever received before and we gave to people that needed it without any hesitation and we began receiving more so we kept giving more. I was confused in why people come to this church, and why I was getting denounced when I give all of myself to the glory of God in who He is making me, so I could love others the way He loved others. How could someone that claimed to love God but not love me?
I was rejoicing with most of my church last week but now I have been persuaded to leave because of the few leaders that have been persecuting me for no reason but to say "You think you are more spiritual than anyone else, or you think you are right, or the way your worship is distracting, and you talk and make comments in Sunday school and donot let the teacher teach. I was not important enough to tell anyone anything,only to listen and learn from one person. I was not to speak what God was revealing to me. Others were allowed to, but not me. I could not understand why this was happening to me, the ones that were persecuting me would not talk to me or have a conversation with me, no one wanted to really know me and what God had done in my life and what He was doing. They only wanted to talk about me or keep what ever they were feeling about me inside.I wanted to know desperately what He was doing in every one’s life and still do, others always shared with me what God was doing in their lives, it was giving me so much joy, but not all. The leaders of the church were the ones that did not know me and they were the ones that did not want to know me. The Pastor and I at one time I thought were becoming very close, he was well educated in the Bible and he had a Doctrine. Iwould go to him often and so would those that disliked me and he would witness their comments. I would always humble myself to the truth of love God was giving me for them and it would only make them angrier and retaliate from me even more. He did not step up for “little ole me” someone that God had truly changed and someone that knew God could change anyone including my Pastor. You see, my Pastor was trapped between flesh and Spirit. How could he tell the leaders of the church to look inside their selves and ask God to reveal to them how they truly felt about me and for what reasons? They needed to ask God why they did not want to love me, a person who loved God so very much. This hurt me so badly because I knew they could not love my Father if they could not love me. If they did not love my Father they had not received the love He had for them, this hurt me! I prayed many weeping prayers for these few people that I knew could not have the love of God in them if they did not love me. I knew God had sent me to them for them to look deep inside and find the love He has for them, waiting for them to open what was closed, their hearts, eyes and ears. I am still praying with a broken heart for them. I was finally persuaded by my pastor to worship at another church since I was being persecuted so much. I had mentioned that to him before but He did not want me to go because people there truly loved me, I did not care if people loved me, I wanted people to love God so they could love me through Him, His way. Not because I was a popular person everyone had accepted but because they knew Him and accepted Him by knowing my love for Him and we could love Him together through words, worship, and deeds! So all of us could do His will in our lives together, while we build each other up to the fullness of Him, that is the church we are supposed to be a part of,that is how the leaders of the church is supposed to think. Where were they?
I love this church and will continue to love very one in this church all the days of my life. I will pray for them not to forget the love I have for my Father so they too can continue to worship freely with the measure of love He gives them through the faith they have. Oh God, I pray that they will let the Holy Spirit lead them so He can lead people into knowing your love, peace and joy through them, so they will know the love you have for them so they can love all people. I will never give up praying and loving the leaders of this church into knowing God’s love even though they might not know the love I have for them, I know God knows that I truly love them. I pray that they do not rely on their own understanding of who He is because if you do not love everyone you can see, how you can truly love God who you can’t see. I will always forgive everyone for what they have done and said because I was forgiven by my God through Jesus Christ on the cross, how could not forgive if His love remains in me. I am just a package he sends to those in need, that He has put His gifts in to give to others, it is up to them to know they need the gifts and open the package and truly see His love He is offering them, so they too can be His package to send for someone else. We are all His packages to receive His gifts, but if we have not received His gifts, we will not be His package He sends. We are all His answered prayers for people even if they do not realize it, our hope is always in Christ that someday they will.
So I tell you this,and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do,in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding andseparated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due tothe hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have giventhemselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, withthe continual lust for more. You, however, did not come to know Christ thatway. Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with thetruth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way oflife, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitfuldesires: to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the newself, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. There each ofyou must put off falsehood and speak truthful to his neighbor, for we are allmembers of one body. In your anger do not sin Do not let the sun go down whileyou are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold, He who has been stealingmust steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands,that he may have something to share with those in need. Do not let any unwholesometalk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up accordingto their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve theHOLY Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Getrid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with everyform of malice, Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgive each other,just as in Christ God forgave you.